Forgive Us Our Debts

One of the first things people consider when they receive financial windfalls - gifts, winnings, bonuses, dividends, or finds - is the opportunity to be free of debt, or at least to reduce the obligation.

We treasure the letters from loan companies informing that our debt has been Paid in Full. Sometimes we write PIF on the final payment check. There are mortgage burning parties, a celebration finalizing the end of constant payments and a sense of freedom.


The sense of freedom. The release. Available attention (and funds) to apply to other interest in our life. Ahh...

The same experience awaits my emotional life. When I feel that others owe me, I am carrying the debt. When I feel I owe another, I am carrying debt. The phrase in the Lord's Prayer in which I ask to be forgiven applies the condition that I forgive others. 

"Forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors."

And not only that I forgive, but that I be forgiven in the manner which I forgive. I pray that I forgive freely and easily; however, knowing me, it might take a minute (or so) for me to both recognize that I am still holding on and to acknowledge how grasping my hurt is interfering in my life.

My mind is filled with platitudes and analogies about letting go and moving on, but they are useless until I can apply them to a specific situation in which I am struggling. As I stay in a prayerful mind, my "issues" are revealed and I can choose to face and address them.

We are for each other mirrors of joy and distress. When we listen with complete attention we become acutely aware of areas in each others lives where when love is applied, forgiveness follows.

Forgiveness clears the air preparing for newness in relationship with each other. Forgiveness allow us to move on without regrets or baggage, as we release the past. Forgiveness is the gift we give ourselves, the way we claim our freedom.

May your life be happy, joyous and free.

Finding Clarity

Out beyond ideas
of wrongdoing and rightdoing,
there is a field.

I'll meet you there.

When the soul lies down
in that grass,
the world is too full to talk about.

Ideas, language
- even the phrase "each other" -
do not make any sense. 

Rumi

This was one of my favorite quotes and I often included it in my correspondence hoping to "force" the issue of giving up judgement and coming to an understanding of "I'm Okay. You're Okay." It was my seasonal practice to tout my clarity of mind - "Yeah, I know you don't like/approve/accept me/my life/my choice, but come on, get over it." This worked, in my mind, until a friend shared...

My job is to be in the field (beyond wrongdoing and rightdoing). To be there, waiting. It is not my place to dictate when others arrive, if they arrive. If I keep putting out that I will meet them in that field, it stands to reason that I get there.  

The only way to stand in that field of clarity is to let go. I must let go of my scenario of past events. I must deny the ego's grasp on our version of events, knowing that holding on to how I see things merely feeds my justification for being hurt or resentful. As I focus my energies in the present moment, I commit to healing whatever happened before and reconciling my relationships in love.

There is therefore, now, no separation.

Separation is the illusion.

Only Love is real.

Bright blessings.

Being with What Is

This season I am focused on being at peace with things as they are. Here is the Serenity Prayer in its original form.

Serenity Prayer by Reinhold Niebuhr

God, give us grace to accept with serenity
the things that cannot be changed,
Courage to change the things
which should be changed,
and the Wisdom to distinguish
the one from the other.

Living one day at a time,
Enjoying one moment at a time,
Accepting hardship as a pathway to peace,
Taking, as Jesus did,
This sinful world as it is,
Not as I would have it,
Trusting that You will make all things right,
If I surrender to Your will,
So that I may be reasonably happy in this life,
And supremely happy with You forever in the next.

Amen.

We speak of living in the present, yet forget to stop and acknowledge Now. We review the past, plan the future; grimace through regrets, organize objectives for goals, then fall pray to distress. It is in the constant drawing our attentions to each moment that we find relief and peace. For in this exact second, all is well.

Bright blessings in the shadows...